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Getting Old Is Not For Sissies

Tonight I sat down and began watching Pearl Jam Twenty.  It's weird how something like a documentary can take you back in time and make you remember your youth.

When you are in your twenties...you just can't imagine who you'll be when you're 40.  It seems so far away.  When you are in your forties, you think...why didn't I do more stupid stuff...take more risks.  And then you turn around and look at people in their twenties and you feel a weird sort of anger and understanding that they just don't get about you.  It's almost like they are on one continent and you are on another.  

I hadn't thought about the 90's in a good while.  I had a huge social life and I was just out there in a way I haven't been in so long it almost seems like it didn't ever happen.  It was good for me to remember how I used to feel since I work with a lot of twenty somethings and if I can remind myself who I used to be...maybe I can be a better person for them to work with.  And maybe I can't work through my weird anger/ambivilance about aging.

My Dad always says...it's better than the alternative.  That doesn't make it easy.

About to go over the edge

I am just 5 lbs away from weighing what I did in Brooklyn when I was doing Weight Watchers and walking like crazy.  I'm pretty impressed with myself.  I've lost 30 pounds so far.

I'm pretty excited about going to our holiday party at work this year...I can buy something really pretty and feel good in my outfit instead of wearing pants or a blazer and trying to melt into the background.

I also went to a yoga class.  When I was in NYC I went to this great studio called OM.  I went several days a week and on the wkend with my friend Todd.  We laughed at how terrible we were and it was good for our health.  When I got to Virginia...I couldn't find a studio that really worked for me.  But I do think this studio will suit me a lot better.

It was pretty funny because I forgot how tough yoga can be.  The class was a basics class but there were a lot of things I couldn't really do well.  And boy was I sore the next few days.  It was funny b/c after the class, the teacher gave me another class recommendation...LOL.  I really didn't care so much...whatever I couldn't do...I just didn't do.  It's going to take some time to get back into the swing of yoga.

Next...I'm going to think about trying to date again.